Holding nothing back…

And she wonders why I starved myself?

Posted on: January 6, 2009

This is pretty much typical of the types of jokes I get in my e-mail from my mother, and it’s typical of her attitude towards weight pretty much my entire life. The e-mail reads:

A woman goes to the doctor for her yearly physical.  The nurse starts with certain basic items.

‘How much do you weigh?’ she asks.

‘115,’ she says.

The nurse puts her on the scale.  It turns out her weight is 140 (I wish).

The nurse asks, ‘Your height?’

‘5 foot 8,’ she says.

The nurse checks and sees that she only measures 5 ‘ 5‘.

She then takes her blood pressure and tells the woman it is very high.

‘Of course it’s high!’ she screams, ‘When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I’m short and fat!’

Ok, remember a while ago when I told you guys to mark your calendar because I would probably never use the BullshitMI as a voice of reason again? Well, ladies and gentlemen, aparantely hell has frozen over, because I’m doing it again! The woman in the joke “thinks” she is tall and slender at 5’8″ and 115. According to this BullshitMI calculator, that would be a BullshitMI of 17.5, or UNDERWEIGHT. Not just “slender,” but approximately 10 pounds underweight (and that’s to be at the very BOTTOM of the “normal” weight catagory). Her actual height and weight (you know, the ones that make her “short and fat” and raise her blood pressure so severely) is 5’5″ and 140. Same calculator shows her BullshitMI to be 23.3, or NORMAL.

And this is the kind of shit I’ve been fed since I was a child, by BOTH of my parents.  ::::eyeroll::::


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